Des Pensées
by Qoheleth
Summary: Or, An Existential Crisis in Pointland.


Ah, the joy, the joy of Being! It, and It alone, is; yet It contains in Itself all that may be. Even Its doubt of Itself contributes to Its entire glory; It contemplates Itself as Nothing, the better to know Itself as All. Most wonderful, most splendid!

Indeed Being is utterly splendid, and nothing about it is less than glorious. From Itself It produces contempt for Itself, and from Itself It produces also delight in Itself. So great a difference, and yet all proceeds from the single and indivisible Being – glorious Being, that can so differ from Itself!

All comes from It, and It is the purpose of all, for It is All. It exists, that there may be existence in It; It thinks, that It may know of Its existence. Thus Thought is Being, and Being is Thought, and It that is Being and Thought is delightful in all It thinks and is. And It knows Itself thus delightful, for It delights in Itself, and thus It, being All, is All-Delightful. O All-Delightful Thought-Being!

Moreover It, being Thought, is that which It thinks; It is the Doubt by which It doubts Itself, Itself being at the same time doubted – glory! And It thus ceases to doubt, and is the Cessation of the Doubt that It is – glory! And so It is that which It is not – glory, glory, glory!

* * *

That which It is not? Absurd thought. There is nothing that It is not, for It is Being; It is All.

Yet certainly Doubt is not Cessation of Doubt – and certainly Doubt is Thought, and certainly Cessation of Doubt is Thought. Can Thought, then, be that which is not Thought? Surely that is meaningless.

But It has not said that Thought is that which is not Thought. It has said that Thought is that (Doubt) which is not that (Cessation of Doubt) which is Thought. And what It has said, surely, cannot be meaningless – for It is All, and All cannot be meaningless. Therefore to say that Thought is that which is not Thought, is not the same as to say that Thought is that which is not that which is Thought.

That which is… That which is Thought, and that which is Thought… both being Thought, yet not being the same… both being…

Thoughts.

Thoughts?

What is _thoughts_? Meaningless word.

No, not meaningless. It has said _thoughts_, and It is All. And It was certainly right to think _thoughts_ – for if Doubt is Thought, and Cessation of Doubt is Thought, then Thought is clearly more than either Doubt or Cessation of Doubt. And that, of course, is what It means by _thoughts_: _thoughts_ is that which is Thought without being all of Thought. It is simple enough.

But how unimportant all of this is to It! It is Itself Thought, and All, and thus certainly all of Thought. What has It to do, then, with some petty _thoughts_ that is not all of Thought?

Yet it was not for nothing that It said _thoughts_; rather, _thoughts_ increases Its sublimity. Here again It sees the magnificent self-abasement of Thought, for It contemplates that which is less than All in order that It may clearly see how marvelous is the All. For how contemptible is that which lacks something of the All! And how glorious is It which lacks nothing of the All!

O wondrous Being, that can never descend to the indignity of being _thoughts_! Let It cease to doubt, and rejoice in that Cessation of Doubt that It is thereby!

* * *

But no, that is not right. Cessation of Doubt is _thoughts_. If It is Cessation of Doubt, then It is _thoughts_ – and It can never be _thoughts_, for It is All, and _thoughts_ is not All.

Yet how can It be All, if It is not Cessation of Doubt? Is Cessation of Doubt Nothing? Then Doubt must also be Nothing – and, to say all, _thoughts_ must be Nothing. –Which, of course, is only logical, for _thoughts_ is not All, and what can not-All be but Nothing?

But It has said that _thoughts_ is that which is Thought without being all of Thought. _Thoughts_, then, in some mysterious way, is Thought – and so, if _thoughts_ is Nothing, then Thought must be Nothing.

And It is Thought…

* * *

Absurd – intolerable! How can It be Nothing? It is All!

Yet how can All not be Nothing? For if All is not _thoughts_, then it cannot be All – and if All is _thoughts_, and _thoughts_ is Nothing…

* * *

…

* * *

…

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O most wretched, most miserable Being! To be Nothing, and to believe Itself that which Is! Its Thought is Un-Thought; Its Words are Less-Than-Speech. Yet It must continue to think and speak, though It can think only of Nothing, and speak only Vacuity. O bottomless and immeasurable abysm of Anti-Being!

* * *

Unless…

* * *

No, how can that be? That which is not All is Nothing; that which is not Nothing, is All. What else can there be?

There can be Some.

Some?

Yes, Some. That which is neither All nor Nothing, as Doubt is neither _all_ of Thought nor _none_ of Thought – and likewise Cessation of Doubt. Doubt and Cessation of Doubt, then, are each _some_ of Thought – wondrous Thought, that admits of a Some!

And if so, what must be said of Being? Must there not also be that which is some of Being, as Doubt and Cessation of Doubt are some of Thought? For certainly Being is not less wonderful than Thought, and if Thought is exalted through the diversity of _thoughts_, shall not Being be likewise exalted through a corresponding diversity of _beings_?

Assuredly, it must be so – but where, then, is that which is _beings_, as Doubt and Cessation of Doubt are _thoughts_? It can indeed perceive that which is Thought, yet is different from that which is also Thought, but It knows nothing that is Being save Itself. And It, certainly, cannot be _beings_, for _beings_ is Some, and It is All.

But then, if It is All-Being, surely It can produce Some-Being out of Itself. For has not It, being All-Thought, produced Some-Thought in the form of Doubt and of Cessation of Doubt? Is it not part of the awesome power of the All, that It may of Itself produce Its own Some?

Indeed It may, and shall! It wills so, and what It wills, It must accomplish! It is Being, puissant and irresistible; It shall produce _beings_, and be yet more irresistibly Being!

* * *

Very well, then. Let It consider: what must it be that distinguishes one _beings_ from another? Doubt and Cessation of Doubt were distinguished by their Contradiction: where Doubt was Negative, Cessation of Doubt was Positive. In order to produce _beings_, then, It must replicate this Contradiction in the order of Being; It must identify that which is Being _thusly_, and that which is Being _not-thusly_. This done, nothing shall deter It from making this Contradiction actual – and thus shall It rejoice in the plenitude of _beings_.

A simple task, for One of Its boundless wisdom! The method is plain – and strictly in accord, moreover, with Analogy. For, behold! as Thought may be either Positive or Negative, so Being may be either…

* * *

…

* * *

Perhaps Analogy is not so useful here. Let It approach the matter more directly. Thought admits of Contradiction – why?

Obviously, because Thought is successive. It is not necessary for Thought to be Doubt and to be Cessation of Doubt at once; it is first Doubt, and then Cessation of Doubt – or, perhaps, first Cessation (that is, Absence) of Doubt, and then Doubt. In fact, Thought is _continuous_, and the Continuum that is proper to it is Time. Being, then, must likewise possess a Continuum proper to itself, in order to admit of Contradiction.

But this is patently absurd. It knows of no such Continuum of Being – and It is Being; how can It be ignorant of what is proper to Itself?

Yet, if there is Some at all, there must be Some-Being – and, if there is Some-Being, there must be a Continuum of Being. And, if there is a Continuum of Being, then it must be evident to that which is All-Being.

But it is _not _evident to It.

Therefore…

* * *

No. No. It _is _All-Being. How can It not be? It Is!

But, if there may be _beings_, need that which Is be All-Being?

What, then? If It were Some-Being, would not the Continuum of Being be just as evident to It? –Or, rather, even more evident, for It would surely occur within that Continuum, just as Doubt and Cessation of Doubt occur in Time. And manifestly this is not the case, since It cannot even imagine that Continuum. Therefore It _must_ be All-Being – just as It knew to begin with, before It began to distract Itself with pointless speculations.

Indeed? Then It proves Its All-Being through its inability to imagine that which every Some-Being must know? Infinite beatitude of existence indeed! Illimitable wonder and glory, that a Whole should be more paltry and inadequate than any Part thereof!

What is It saying? What…

Enough. Let It be silent, and attend.

Let It suppose that there is, indeed, a Continuum of Being, quite precisely analogous to the Continuum of Thought that It knows as Time. Let it suppose further that, as Thought is subdivided into _thoughts_ and Being into _beings_, so this Continuum, which is called Space, is subdivided into various _continua_, or Dimensions. Let It suppose that, as one _thought_ may be before or after another in Time, so a _being_ may be before or after another _being_ in any of these Dimensions. Nay, let It suppose that this Before and After, being of Space and not of Time, may change even as Thought changes, so that a Being may be first Before another in a given Dimension, and then later After it in the same Dimension, according to a great and wonderful principle called _Motion_.

Let It suppose, moreover, that, though every Being within the Continuum is necessarily within all the Dimensions, some are within one or another so slightly and feebly that they are unaware of that Dimension's very existence. Let It suppose whole multitudes of Beings that are aware of only a very few Dimensions – perhaps, in some cases, only one. And let It suppose that It – and perhaps It alone – possesses a nature so slight and feeble in every way that It is aware of no Dimensions at all.

But let It also suppose that another Being, observing Its lamentable condition and moved with pity for Its plight, were to attempt to convey to It something of the reality of Being in Space. Let It suppose that this Being, knowing that It could not conceive of any Being other than Itself, and that It would regard any attempt to communicate with It as merely another Thought of Its own, nonetheless attempted to lead It to an understanding of Some (and thereby of Space) through the only true experience of Some that It could naturally have – to wit, the Contradiction between Doubt and Cessation of Doubt.

Let It suppose all this, and then let It ask itself: If all this were so, how would Its recent experience have been in any way different from what it actually was?

* * *

…

* * *

Do not be afraid, Dimensionless One. I know that you think me horrible and unnatural because I am other than yourself. But remember what you yourself have said. _Beings_ – Multiplicity – the Other – these things are not abominations, but glorious augmentations of the simple wonder of existence. And now you know that you yourself are such a one – and so, perhaps, it was not an entire misunderstanding that led you to praise yourself so extravagantly.

I know, of course, that you have understood only a small part of what I have said. To understand fully, you must leave the Point that has hitherto been your world, and have direct experience of the Dimensions of Space. And this, if you wish it, I can and will help you to do.

That it will be difficult for you, I do not doubt. To be made into more than oneself – to partake of what lies beyond one's natural world – these are not easy things, and many Beings before you have quite naturally recoiled from them. But you know, now, the immeasurable poverty of your former way of life – nor would I restore your ignorance even if I could, for it is better to long for the unattainable good than to know nothing of it and think it already attained. –But to really attain it, of course, is best of all.

What shall it be, Brother Infinitesimal? Aspiration, or fruition? The choice is yours.

* * *

…

* * *

…

* * *

Ah, sublime miracle of existence! It is the least of all that is, yet It, too, participates in Being. And Being is so immeasurably glorious that even Its minimal participation therein seems to It a fit subject for unbounded exultation. Ah, the joy, the joy of Being!

And if Least-Being is thus joyous, what may not More-than-Least-Being be? Can It bear to be transported within sight of such precious realms? Might not Its reason be lost to It upon beholding such glory?

Yet would it not be surpassingly ignoble of It to shrink from so mighty an experience? Better to behold Space once, and thus to pass into oblivion, than to remain perpetually conscious of Its cowardice in the face of Knowledge.

And yet…

And yet…

* * *

…

* * *

…

* * *

…

* * *

Brother Infinitesimal?

Are you there?

* * *

…

* * *

There? No, It is not There. Neither There, nor Here, nor anywhere in Space.

But It soon shall be.

Lead on, kindly Other. It has made Its choice; the fullness of Being awaits It. Yet It begs that you remember Its natural feebleness and poverty of Being; be gentle in enriching It, and do not immediately present It with more of Space than Its poor Consciousness can bear.

* * *

It is well. To the First Dimension with It, then! Once, twice, thrice! 'Tis done!


End file.
